Let’s talk about recruiters. You know, the people you trust a bit less than real estate agents. And yes, I’m one of them. It’s a strange job. No one really trusts you, but they still want your help, usually urgently and usually yesterday.
Here’s the thing most people don’t realise: a lot of the nonsense recruiters come out with isn’t actually ours. It’s the clients. We’re stuck in the middle, translating phrases like “dynamic self-starter” into “we don’t really know what we want, but we’ll know it when we see it.”
Recruitment has developed its own language. Part motivational poster, part absolute rubbish and often nowhere near reality. I’m not pretending I’m innocent in this, but it’s probably time to lift the curtain a bit. Some of this might sting.
“We’ll Keep Your CV on File”
When a recruiter says this, it sounds reassuring. What it usually means is that your CV is about to disappear into a folder that no one actively looks at.
Not because we don’t care. We do. But unless you’re right for something now, your chances of resurfacing are slim. It’s not sitting in a carefully curated talent pipeline; it’s sitting next to hundreds of others labelled “maybe.”
If you haven’t heard back in a month, you haven’t been secretly shortlisted. You’ve just been overtaken by events. Resend it if you want, or don’t. Same outcome.
And while we’re here, please stop listing “Proficient in Microsoft Word” as a skill. It’s now 2026.n technical competence, admitting psychological struggle feels like a professional weakness. The stigma around seeking mental health help contributes to underreporting and perpetuates dangerous silence. This silence isn’t just harmful – it’s deadly.
“Competitive Salary”
Candidate: “What’s the salary?”
Recruiter: “It’s open to discussion based on experience.”
Which is recruiter-speak for one of three things: the client hasn’t decided, they know exactly what it is and don’t want to say, or they’re hoping someone exceptional will accept far less than market rate.
If a role pays well, the salary is usually very clear. Because money attracts people. When it’s vague, that’s your first clue. The second is normally: “We’re like a family here.”
“We’re Like a Family Here”
If you see this in a job ad, that’s usually your cue to leave. It rarely means supportive or nurturing. It usually means blurred boundaries, unpaid overtime and a strong expectation that work comes first.
These workplaces love phrases like “We work hard, play hard” (your weekend is gone), “All hands on deck” (your plans are cancelled), and “We’re all in this together” (management is unavailable).
You don’t need a workplace family. You need a workplace that respects your time and doesn’t confuse loyalty with compliance.
The Bit No One Likes Admitting
Most recruiters aren’t deliberately misleading people. They’re passing on what they’ve been given, sometimes word for word.
At TMR, we try to be radical! We tell people what the job actually is. Not every role is life-changing. Not every salary is amazing. And that’s fine. We’ll tell you what the role involves, what it pays and what’s not great about it. Because job hunting is hard enough without turning every advert into a puzzle.
So no, we won’t promise a “fast-paced family environment with endless opportunity.” We’ll tell you it’s a decent job, with normal people, fair pay and the occasional sick day. That’s work. We speak English. Actual English. No buzzwords. No lions. No mystical culture-fit riddles. Just honest recruitment. Which, judging by the industry, is still oddly rare.
If you want more recruitment truths with less nonsense, you know where to find us. No sunsets. No slogans. No spiritual awakenings.
At TMR Recruitment, we’re not your typical recruiters. We don’t just find people jobs; we get them excited about their careers again. So, whether you’re ready to make a move or need someone who is, let’s chat. No fluff, just real opportunities. Get in touch to find out more.
